Forgiving is easy. Now I want to forget

It takes a lot to make me angry. I don't like feeling mad, and so it's almost impossible for me to hold a grudge (no matter how hard I try). But even though I'm quick to forgive, it's sometimes hard for me to forget.

Why is it that we always remember the bad – the times we were hurt and the times we felt sad? The low times in my life have burned vivid memories into my brain that can't be erased. Maybe it's an innate mechanism meant to protect us from making the same painful mistakes in the future. If you can remember what caused you pain, then maybe you can prevent it from happening again.

This reminds me of something I learned in sociobiology. There is a type of red berry that makes a species of birds violently ill. Traumatized by the experience, the bird never eats a single red berry ever again. Through negative reinforcement, the bird learns how to avoid future cases of food poisoning. But, what the bird doesn't realize is that he also misses out on all the other delicious, non-poisonous red berries.

So, it makes me wonder if remembering the bad means you stop taking taking risks. Maybe that's why some people stop plunging into the unknown and start carefully weighing the pros and cons before taking the first steps. When your heart and brain pull you in opposite directions, it's a sad day when you no longer let your heart win.

Even though I think it's important to learn from your mistakes and hardships, part of me wants to forget all the times I felt sad, hurt and betrayed. I don't want to worry about making mistakes that will hurt me later. I want to my life in the moment with a full heart.